That’s the way to solve the problem, mate
Information, Communication and Culture Minister Datuk Seri Dr Rais Yatim yesterday suggested that all media return to using the terminology swine flu instead of Influenza A (H1N1). It is easier for radio and TV announcers to say selsema babi (swine flu) than H1N1 in Bahasa Malaysia.
NO HOLDS BARRED
Raja Petra Kamarudin
WHAT THE WORLD WORRIES ABOUT
H1N1 out of control
Attempts to contain the virus is impossible: expert
ATLANTA: Health officials estimate that as many as 1 million Americans now have H1N1 flu. Lyn Finelli, a flu surveillance official with the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention, voiced the estimate at a vaccine advisory meeting yesterday in Atlanta.
The estimate is based on mathematical modeling. Nearly 28,000 US cases have been reported to the CDC, accounting for roughly half the world’s cases. The US count includes 3,065 hospitalisations and 127 deaths. An estimated 15 million to 60 million Americans catch seasonal flu each year.
The percentage of cases hospitalised has been growing, but that may be due to closer scrutiny of very sick patients. It takes about three days from the onset of symptoms to hospitalisation, Finelli said, and the average hospital stay has been three days.
Other health problems have been a factor in most cases: About one in three of the hospitalised cases had asthma, 16 per cent diabetes, 12 per cent have immune system problems and 11 per cent chronic heart disease. The numbers again highlight how the young seem to be particularly at risk of catching the new virus.
But data also show that the flu has been more dangerous to adults who catch it. The average age of swine flu patients is 12, the average age for hospitalised patients is 20, and for people who died, it was 37. Meanwhile in London, it has been reported that parts of Britain now have so many cases of H1N1 flu that it cannot be contained, it was revealed yesterday.
In the worst hit areas, antiviral treatment will only be given to people with symptoms, and schools will no longer be closed. Speaking yesterday, Andy Burnham, the Health Secretary, and Sir Liam Donaldson, the Chief Medical Officer, said that there were hotspots where swabbing and lab confirmations of the virus were now putting an unjustifiable strain on time and resources.
These areas, including the West Midlands and London, are now moving from the containment phase, which is led by the Health Protection Agency, to outbreak management, led by the strategic health authorities and local health trusts. Burnham said that, as of yesterday morning, there were 3,597 lab-confirmed cases of H1N1 flu in the UK.
“Majority of these cases have shown only mild symptoms, though some cases have been more serious,” he said. “Our approach has focused on containing the spread and working with the local NHS to identify cases and isolate them as quickly as possible and treat them with antivirals and treat those around them and offer prophylactic treatment to those around them.
“This is very resource-intensive, but it has been highly successful.” He added that, while containment had worked well, the Department of Health had never been under any illusions that it could prevent the spread indefinitely. — Agencies
HOW MALAYSIA SOLVES THE PROBLEM
Back to swine flu
Information, Communication and Culture Minister Datuk Seri Dr Rais Yatim yesterday suggested that all media return to using the terminology swine flu instead of Influenza A (H1N1).
He said this was to ensure that the people realised the danger of the disease and to get the message across to them more accurately.
It is also easier for radio and TV announcers to say selsema babi (swine flu) than H1N1 in Bahasa Malaysia. – Bernama
That is how Malaysia will solve the H1N1 problem. We shall give it a new name that is easier for Malay newsreaders to pronounce. So, instead of calling it H1N1, we shall call it selsema babi.
H1N1 is a mouthful to pronounce in Malay. H-one-N-one is four syllables in English. But if in Malay, which would be H-satu-N-satu, it would be six syllables. Selsema babi is only five syllables.
“Hold on,” you might say. “If we are talking about just one extra syllable, then why is it a problem so say H-satu-N-satu as opposed to selsema babi?” Ah, but there is another reason for calling it selsema babi and not H1N1. This is, as the minister said, “To ensure that the people realise the danger of the disease and to get the message across to them more accurately.”
It seems if it is called H1N1, then people would relax and not consider it that serious a danger. But if the word ‘babi’ is attached to the disease, then people will realise that it is a very serious thing indeed.
I worry, though, that some Malaysians may start to protest if we call it selsema babi instead of H1N1. You see, some time ago, someone, somewhere decided that the word babi should no longer be used and instead it should be replaced with the word khinzir. So, will we now have to, again, change it from selsema babi to selsema khinzir to ensure that we are ‘politically correct’?
Phew, am I glad I am not a cabinet minister. Can you just see the dilemma ministers have to face in combating problems such as contagious diseases? They spend weeks of their time and have to engage in a series of meetings just to figure out what names these diseases should be called so that they can eradicate all these life-threatening diseases by giving it the proper name.
Actually, if you were to just sit down and mull over all the problems afflicting our country, with a level head, you can actually figure out all the solutions to these problems. Take, for example, the problem of loan sharks or ah longs. To those new to Malaysia, the problem of loan sharks is a 100-year old problem, long before Merdeka (independence) in 1957.
Actually, this entire thing started back in the early 1900s when the Indians and Chinese first came to this country to work the estates and tin mines. The non-whites had problems getting credit and the moneylenders from their own community played the role of banker for the small man who was not credit-worthy in the eyes of the bankers.
It was a good thing really. There were no credit cards or finance companies then. Therefore, the only way you could get a loan would be to borrow from the moneylenders. Now, there are so many credit card companies and they stop you on the streets or in shopping centres to offer you a credit card. And if you already own a credit card it is even easier to get another one. So you can actually end up owning a string of credit cards that allow you a credit line of RM5,000 each.
I have actually seen tables set up outside the banks and they would ambush you as you walk in or out of the bank to get you to sign up for a credit card. Imagine if you own ten credit cards. You could spend up to RM50,000 in one go.
Of course, this would mean on your meagre salary of RM2,000 or so it would take you decades to pay off this RM50,000 debt. But there is a solution open to you. You can then borrow RM20,000 from the ah long to pay off some of your credit card debt and then pay the ah long an exorbitant rate of interest that would eventually kill you (sometimes literally as well).
So how will the government solve this problem? Will they ban ah longs and arrest the syndicate bosses and put them behind bars? They tried this two years ago and the head of the CCD ended up getting arrested and was charged with ‘abuse of power’. So don’t try to touch the loan shark syndicate bosses unless you want to go to jail.
Okay, next solution. Will they tighten the rules on credit cards so that people who can’t afford to go into debt will be spared the agony of being swamped with debt? Of course not! That will hurt the industry. They will have to look at another solution without hurting the credit card or loan shark industry.
Anyway, the minister has gone down to the ground and after his short walkabout on a street in Kuala Lumpur he has decided to eradicate the illegal loan shark menace by making them all legal.
That’s right. Malaysia will eradicate the illegal loan shark menace by registering all loan sharks, thereby legalising them (just like how prostitutes are registered in some countries to make them legal ‘sex workers’ and in one swoop prostitution is eradicated).
Soon there will no longer be any illegal loan sharks in Malaysia. There will only be legal loan sharks. And if we can get the religious authorities to slaughter pigs according to the proper Islamic method then pork, ham and bacon will also no longer be haram. I bet the minister never thought of this one yet.
Information, Communication and Culture Minister Datuk Seri Dr Rais Yatim yesterday suggested that all media return to using the terminology swine flu instead of Influenza A (H1N1). It is easier for radio and TV announcers to say selsema babi (swine flu) than H1N1 in Bahasa Malaysia.
NO HOLDS BARRED
Raja Petra Kamarudin
WHAT THE WORLD WORRIES ABOUT
H1N1 out of control
Attempts to contain the virus is impossible: expert
ATLANTA: Health officials estimate that as many as 1 million Americans now have H1N1 flu. Lyn Finelli, a flu surveillance official with the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention, voiced the estimate at a vaccine advisory meeting yesterday in Atlanta.
The estimate is based on mathematical modeling. Nearly 28,000 US cases have been reported to the CDC, accounting for roughly half the world’s cases. The US count includes 3,065 hospitalisations and 127 deaths. An estimated 15 million to 60 million Americans catch seasonal flu each year.
The percentage of cases hospitalised has been growing, but that may be due to closer scrutiny of very sick patients. It takes about three days from the onset of symptoms to hospitalisation, Finelli said, and the average hospital stay has been three days.
Other health problems have been a factor in most cases: About one in three of the hospitalised cases had asthma, 16 per cent diabetes, 12 per cent have immune system problems and 11 per cent chronic heart disease. The numbers again highlight how the young seem to be particularly at risk of catching the new virus.
But data also show that the flu has been more dangerous to adults who catch it. The average age of swine flu patients is 12, the average age for hospitalised patients is 20, and for people who died, it was 37. Meanwhile in London, it has been reported that parts of Britain now have so many cases of H1N1 flu that it cannot be contained, it was revealed yesterday.
In the worst hit areas, antiviral treatment will only be given to people with symptoms, and schools will no longer be closed. Speaking yesterday, Andy Burnham, the Health Secretary, and Sir Liam Donaldson, the Chief Medical Officer, said that there were hotspots where swabbing and lab confirmations of the virus were now putting an unjustifiable strain on time and resources.
These areas, including the West Midlands and London, are now moving from the containment phase, which is led by the Health Protection Agency, to outbreak management, led by the strategic health authorities and local health trusts. Burnham said that, as of yesterday morning, there were 3,597 lab-confirmed cases of H1N1 flu in the UK.
“Majority of these cases have shown only mild symptoms, though some cases have been more serious,” he said. “Our approach has focused on containing the spread and working with the local NHS to identify cases and isolate them as quickly as possible and treat them with antivirals and treat those around them and offer prophylactic treatment to those around them.
“This is very resource-intensive, but it has been highly successful.” He added that, while containment had worked well, the Department of Health had never been under any illusions that it could prevent the spread indefinitely. — Agencies
HOW MALAYSIA SOLVES THE PROBLEM
Back to swine flu
Information, Communication and Culture Minister Datuk Seri Dr Rais Yatim yesterday suggested that all media return to using the terminology swine flu instead of Influenza A (H1N1).
He said this was to ensure that the people realised the danger of the disease and to get the message across to them more accurately.
It is also easier for radio and TV announcers to say selsema babi (swine flu) than H1N1 in Bahasa Malaysia. – Bernama
That is how Malaysia will solve the H1N1 problem. We shall give it a new name that is easier for Malay newsreaders to pronounce. So, instead of calling it H1N1, we shall call it selsema babi.
H1N1 is a mouthful to pronounce in Malay. H-one-N-one is four syllables in English. But if in Malay, which would be H-satu-N-satu, it would be six syllables. Selsema babi is only five syllables.
“Hold on,” you might say. “If we are talking about just one extra syllable, then why is it a problem so say H-satu-N-satu as opposed to selsema babi?” Ah, but there is another reason for calling it selsema babi and not H1N1. This is, as the minister said, “To ensure that the people realise the danger of the disease and to get the message across to them more accurately.”
It seems if it is called H1N1, then people would relax and not consider it that serious a danger. But if the word ‘babi’ is attached to the disease, then people will realise that it is a very serious thing indeed.
I worry, though, that some Malaysians may start to protest if we call it selsema babi instead of H1N1. You see, some time ago, someone, somewhere decided that the word babi should no longer be used and instead it should be replaced with the word khinzir. So, will we now have to, again, change it from selsema babi to selsema khinzir to ensure that we are ‘politically correct’?
Phew, am I glad I am not a cabinet minister. Can you just see the dilemma ministers have to face in combating problems such as contagious diseases? They spend weeks of their time and have to engage in a series of meetings just to figure out what names these diseases should be called so that they can eradicate all these life-threatening diseases by giving it the proper name.
Actually, if you were to just sit down and mull over all the problems afflicting our country, with a level head, you can actually figure out all the solutions to these problems. Take, for example, the problem of loan sharks or ah longs. To those new to Malaysia, the problem of loan sharks is a 100-year old problem, long before Merdeka (independence) in 1957.
Actually, this entire thing started back in the early 1900s when the Indians and Chinese first came to this country to work the estates and tin mines. The non-whites had problems getting credit and the moneylenders from their own community played the role of banker for the small man who was not credit-worthy in the eyes of the bankers.
It was a good thing really. There were no credit cards or finance companies then. Therefore, the only way you could get a loan would be to borrow from the moneylenders. Now, there are so many credit card companies and they stop you on the streets or in shopping centres to offer you a credit card. And if you already own a credit card it is even easier to get another one. So you can actually end up owning a string of credit cards that allow you a credit line of RM5,000 each.
I have actually seen tables set up outside the banks and they would ambush you as you walk in or out of the bank to get you to sign up for a credit card. Imagine if you own ten credit cards. You could spend up to RM50,000 in one go.
Of course, this would mean on your meagre salary of RM2,000 or so it would take you decades to pay off this RM50,000 debt. But there is a solution open to you. You can then borrow RM20,000 from the ah long to pay off some of your credit card debt and then pay the ah long an exorbitant rate of interest that would eventually kill you (sometimes literally as well).
So how will the government solve this problem? Will they ban ah longs and arrest the syndicate bosses and put them behind bars? They tried this two years ago and the head of the CCD ended up getting arrested and was charged with ‘abuse of power’. So don’t try to touch the loan shark syndicate bosses unless you want to go to jail.
Okay, next solution. Will they tighten the rules on credit cards so that people who can’t afford to go into debt will be spared the agony of being swamped with debt? Of course not! That will hurt the industry. They will have to look at another solution without hurting the credit card or loan shark industry.
Anyway, the minister has gone down to the ground and after his short walkabout on a street in Kuala Lumpur he has decided to eradicate the illegal loan shark menace by making them all legal.
That’s right. Malaysia will eradicate the illegal loan shark menace by registering all loan sharks, thereby legalising them (just like how prostitutes are registered in some countries to make them legal ‘sex workers’ and in one swoop prostitution is eradicated).
Soon there will no longer be any illegal loan sharks in Malaysia. There will only be legal loan sharks. And if we can get the religious authorities to slaughter pigs according to the proper Islamic method then pork, ham and bacon will also no longer be haram. I bet the minister never thought of this one yet.
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